I wrote the following yesterday. And then after I wrote it, I dug around AMC’s website.

I am so outraged. Like, speechless. (Well, my version of speechless is kind of word-heavy, but you get it.)

Those stupidheads at AMC are NOT GOING TO BE SHOWING MAD MEN AT ALL IN MAY. NOT AT ALL. NOT SUNDAYS AT MIDNIGHT, NOT WEDNESDAYS AT 3AM, NOT SATURDAYS AT 6AM TO COMPETE WITH ANGEL ON TNT, NOT ANYWHERE AT ALL.

Heard about this great new show but still haven’t gotten around to seeing it? Been waiting for the latest run to wind up, (which it just now has) and maybe you’ve even read that the first two episodes will be airing over the next two weeks?

WELL TOO BAD FOR YOU!!! Guess you’ll have to wait until July.

Way to build momentum, Jack. Or, what’s that other thing… LOSE ANY STEAM YOU HAVE WITH POTENTIAL NEW VIEWERS WHO WILL FORGET ABOUT YOU ONCE THEY START WATCHING NEW EPISODES OF HOUSE AND ER.

Anyway, I think this little intro perfectly sets up the rest of what I had prepared. Enjoy:

I’ve been thinking it’s time to recap AMC’s sins. Some of you are new, but also, like when your shitty boyfriend starts acting all sweet lately, you might be losing perspective.

Let’s take a moment, shall we, to think back to a simpler, happier time.

July, 2007. It all started so perfect. I, like so many others (well, there were like twelve of us, including Matthew Weiner’s mom) had been breathlessly awaiting the premiere of AMC’s new original series.

We watched. We were smitten. We were beholden. We were in its thrall.

(And in some cases, we were unemployed, and so in those early, blissful, income-free days of summer, we watched the episodes over and over. In what turned out to be an uncanny lack of foreshadowing, AMC was repeating each one all over its programming schedule, all week long, both nights and days.)

Okay also we told our friends (and in some cases, siblings) about it. And many of them wanted to see it, but wanted to wait until they could see it from the beginning. A respectable choice in these Netflixian times. We hoped at least for a Mad Men marathon to play catch-up with. (Apparently there was one fairly early in the initial season, perhaps pre-midway through, but I somehow missed it. Was certainly not well promoted.) As the season rolled on, and writers were striking so there was NOTHING ELSE ON TELEVISION, and Mad Men was beginning to receive accolades, AMC just kept sitting on their golden egg, wiggling around, proud of what they’d laid but unwilling to share.

(Yeah. No Mad Men marathon leading up to the season finale. Whatever.)

And then a blog was born. Basket of Kisses beginnings coincided with the blowup that was Peggy’s giving birth. We were going to give that child a home. A basinet of kisses, if you will.

(Okay that was just weird. But I’m having fun so it’s staying.)

And we wait with the collective bated breath for one week later, right there in its regular time slot of Thursdays at 10pm (with an encore at 11) for Smoke Gets in Your Eyes, the pilot.

And now here is the recap, with links to outraged post after outraged post, of what AMC has done wrong. Wrong, wrong wrong.

AMC You’ve Harshed My Happy
The first thing I notice is that the pilot is chopped up into smaller pieces. The commercials are in the wrong spots. Also, they have done away with the cool little branded ‘fun facts’ that appear between commercials and tie in with the advertising.

AMC You’re Harshing My Mellow
Week two I’m all set to watch Ladies Room, and they skip three episodes ahead to New Amsterdam.

AMC You are Damaging My Calm
Nothing new here, I just continue to rant my devastation over the unnecessary, premature editing.

AMC You are Wrinkling My Smooth
Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water… they show episodes 4-6, then they skip to 10; Long Weekend. Included in what they skipped was Hobo Code!!! (An award-winning, revealing and important episode.)

AMC’s Got Stinking Paws
This is where I finally put it together that there were scenes deleted from the premiere airings. I knew they were chopping up the episodes, but I had assumed the content was still untouched, that it was simply a matter of shorter but more frequent commercial breaks (and shorter “acts” in between commercials). But no. Scenes and lines are missing. Not only that, but it has been this way since the very first. During the very first run, The 10pm airing was pristine and intact, and the 11pm was re-editing; missing scenes. Oh god, it still hurts to think about it.

AMC and I are barely on speaking terms.
So now the second run (if you can call it that, what with five missing episodes) is wrapping up, and what’s next? Not only are they showing it in the worst time slot known to time slots, but the AMC website buried the information. It’s like they don’t want people to find it. (It has since been reworded.)

AMC You are Perching My Nerves
This is just irksome. They are flooding the airways with Breaking Bad. Which is like, a great idea. Wish I’d thought of it!

AMC Schedule
And uh… this latest (midnight) run is almost done. You’d think your fans, both the loyal ones and the potentials, might want to hear some news about your future plans to air/not to air? Your scheduled for the airings (still in that same crappy time slot) for episodes 1 and 2, but can you maybe commit?

AMC You do NOT get points for this.
It hurts my heart. The AMC website is showing “deleted scenes” like it’s something to be proud of. And confusing the fuck out of viewers in the process.

Hope this helps. I am totally depressed.

Kisses,
Roberta